Thankful

 

 

With Thanksgiving fast approaching, we have lots of things to be thankful for.  We all need to be thankful that the election season is over and, for at least two years, we do not need to hear about Emily Cain's battle with her weight problem.  I will certainly be thankful when the Hillary supporters stop whining.  Let's face it everyone, Donald Trump won, he's going to be our President, so get over it!  Reflecting on our meeting on November 16, we have lots of things to be thankful for. 

 

            First of all, let's be thankful for root canal.  Sure, many of us fear going to the dentist, but dentist visits can have a silver lining.  President Lucie chose to have root canal immediately before our meeting which prevented her from speaking.  As a result, Jackson had to run his second meeting in a row and we can certainly be thankful for the fact that he does a nice job running a meeting.

 

            We can all be thankful that Chris Indorf is now an education administrator and no longer a teacher.  Chris demonstrated the speaking ability of Gary Johnson, the Libertarian candidate for President, by completely screwing up the introduction to the four-way test and then failing to be able to count to four.  I am sure if you ask Chris, he would tell you that Aleppo is just north of Bangor. 

 

            Let's be thankful for Randy Forcier's attendance run.  Randy is singlehandedly improving the Club's overall attendance record.  We had many clothing items at this week's meeting to be thankful for including the Goodwin brothers calling each other in advance of the meeting and electing to wear the same colored shirts, it was adorable.  Heather MacLean showed up in her black naugahyde skinny pants (she swears that only three naugas were killed in the production of those pants).  Of course, I inquired about what inspired the pants and she authorized me to disclose that she is in the process of getting a divorce.  The black symbolized the inevitable sadness one experiences in snapping the bonds of matrimony and the skin-tight nature of the pants announced that she will soon be available.  While none of us should be thankful for divorce, many of us should be thankful for a form-fitting wardrobe. 

 

            Thankfully, our stellar Red Ribbon Committee is going to be getting back at it after the departure of one of its co-chairs, Andy Greif, with a meeting scheduled for November 22, at 5:15 p.m. at the Community Bicycle Center.  All members of the Club are welcome to attend. 

 

            We can all be thankful for the fact that Christmas decorations have been up in stores since well before Halloween and that Peggy Bean has stepped up to help with the Christmas Adopt-A-Family efforts along with Heather MacLean.  As of November 16 it sounded like we will have four families with a total of 18 kids (we can be thankful for the lack of birth control) who we would be supporting this Christmas. I understand it may have blossomed to 17 families with 48 kids.  So it may be all hands on deck for this project! We will have shopping, wrapping and distribution coming up.  I believe the shopping will take place on November 30.

 

            We can all be thankful for the fact that we have a week off from our Rotary meetings next week so please do not show up to the Run of the Mill on November 23, the day before Thanksgiving.  We can also be thankful for the fact that that means that Lucie will not have presided at a meeting for three weeks in a row.  Even Roland Gagne is beginning to wonder if Lucie will ever run another meeting.

 

            Thanks to all those people who signed up to ring those crappy Salvation Army bells at the Walmart on December 16.  I am sure there are still slots available and the signup sheets will be recirculated on November 30.

 

            I am certain that Elaine Palmitessa would be thankful for any thoughts and prayers related to her husband who was recently hospitalized.  We had no details regarding his medical condition but I am sure we all wish him a quick recovery.

 

            Karen Chasse, adorned in polka dots, was certainly thankful that most everyone sold their raffle tickets.  She only had one left that was unsold and she was certain that she could sell that one.  She was also hopeful; however, that the money for the 37 tickets that have allegedly been sold but the money has not been turned in will show up at some point.  Jim Godbout was thankful for winning the 50/50 and immediately donated the money to Red Ribbon.  He then announced that he knew of a family that needed some help at Thanksgiving and encouraged everyone to put some money in the pot.  He was certainly thankful for everyone who opened their wallets and gave him some money to help that family at Thanksgiving.  It was later disclosed that the family was one of his neighbors at Kinney Shores.  Apparently, their silver had tarnished and they needed to hire outside help to get it all polished before Thanksgiving and this money was going to help hire the polishers.  Anything that we can do to help those poor people in Kinney Shores is really the least we can do for those impoverished folk. 

 

            We were then thankful for our Sergeants-at-Arms, Fausto, Sarah and Matt getting up to do their thing.  I am sure that Sarah and Matt were happy that Fausto was back because he carried their sorry-asses.  They actually walked up to the front of the meeting to the thunderous applause coming solely from Joe Moreshead, the consummate suck-up. 

 

During the Sergeant-at-Arms' performance, there were a number of things to be thankful for.  We certainly should be thankful for the parking spaces in front of Run of the Mill to accommodate the weak and the frail like Fausto and Joe Moreshead.  We  should be thankful for the fact that Conrad Wentzell's mother is recovering from her stroke.  We should also be thankful for the fact that Jim Godbout is receiving so much publicity that he has now even arranged to have the moon as his private spotlight in some of his photoshoots.  Jim should certainly be thankful for the fact that Conrad Wentzell actually bowed down to him at the Pillars of Pride event.  We should thank both Jackson and Roland Gagne for attending the 100th Anniversary of the Rotary Foundation though they failed to satisfy the dress code for the event.  We should also be thankful Roland is full of enough crap that he can spontaneously speak when asked to do so at events such as the Foundation celebration.  I am certainly thankful for the fact that Bernice took some time out of her busy schedule at the food drive to pass out Saco and Biddeford Savings Institution swag and business cards.  I noticed she was encouraging the young man collecting bottles right next to us to open up an account at our Biddeford branch.  Fausto showed off an old picture of Joe Moreshead back when he was still in the porn industry and was sporting a Tom Selleck mustache.  I am thankful for razors.  Finally, we should all be thankful for the fact that Fausto is an internet stalker, otherwise our Sergeants-at-Arms would have little to talk about.

 

Every week most of us are thankful for the fact that Jim Audiffred bakes cookies and brings them to our meetings for dessert.  It is certainly nice to have our own Pillsbury Doughboy in the Club.

 

I am thankful for the fact that Randy Forcier is seldom confronted with the need to open sliding doors as Randy could not figure out the complicated sliding door system between the two dining rooms.  Randy, I will give you a hint, look for the gap between the doors and push to either the right or to the left.

 

We should all be thankful for Jackson bringing in a new member to our Club, Nicole Carroll.  We should also express our appreciation to Karen Chasse who stood in for Lucie and read the little welcoming message for Nicole.  Finally, we want to thank hawkeye Joe Moreshead for spotting Nicole's Rotary pen which Jackson had carelessly discarded in the corner of the room.  Welcome to the Club, Nicole.

 

Finally (perhaps not finally but it sounded good), we should all be thankful for organizations like the Esther House located in the Notre Dame convent building on Thornton Avenue across from the old fire station.  Esther House, which was apparently named for a woman named Esther who was a good Samaritan from Quebec as well as being named after a woman named Esther from the Old Testament of the Bible (I could get into the details but I don't want to bore you) is a transition home for women who have been incarcerated.  Sister Joanne Roy visited our Club and shared with us how the Esther House takes in up to seven women most of whom have previously been incarcerated and provide them with housing while they transition back into the world.  These women have all been through a transition program operated by the state and they generally come to the Esther House with jobs, but they need a place to live and they need some significant support while they get their lives back together again.

 

All of the women who live at Esther House pay rent to the organization in the amount of $500.00 per month to help with the overhead costs.  They are assigned chores at the house and they eat dinner together.  They have meetings and they are provided incentives for doing good deeds.  They can receive counseling at the Esther House as well as visits from their probation officers. 

 

Sister Joanne Roy told us that most of the formerly-incarcerated women were in jail for drug-related offenses.  They were usually stealing money in order to buy drugs.  As a result, many of the women who end up at the Esther House have addiction issues or other mental health issues.  The Esther House does not provide direct counseling but helps to coordinate that counseling for the women.  Furthermore, the support provided by Esther House certainly acts to subsidize any counseling that the women are receiving.

 

The Esther House conducts yard sales and other fundraising events with the assistance and cooperation of the church while receiving the rent from the women and a $50,000 per year grant.  They are always in need of functional items for the house and they are apparently looking for an electric stove and an upright vacuum cleaner.  They do receive some support from the community including the employees at Haley's Metal Shop going in and helping to paint out some of the rooms in the house and UNE students going over and helping with some gardening. 

 

We should all be thankful for the fact that there are such good people in the world who are willing to reach out and help people who have made poor decisions in their lives, but are trying to make things right again.  The Esther House is one of many very quiet, wonderful facilities in our area that really does make a difference.

 

When we hear about the women who need assistance at the Esther House, their circumstances should make us all very thankful for what we have including our families, our health and  our collective ability to help others. 

 

FMI: http://www.scimsisters.org/our-service/esther-residence

 

Please have a wonderful and safe Thanksgiving and perhaps by the time we come back to a meeting on November 30th, Lucie will grace us at the podium.