Following is the inspirational reading from our AER lunch meeting on June 6, 2018 and submitted by Anne Adasiak-Andrew. It is from Katherine Schafler’s article on Thrive Global (https://www.thriveglobal.com/stories/16020-4-questions-we-unconsciously-ask-near-constantly)
Katherine Schafler writes: “Maya Angelou suggests there are four silent questions that we’re all unconsciously asking each other all the time. When the silent answer to each of the four silent questions is a definitive YES, the love (or our basic sense of humanity) in the relationship becomes more palpable and is immediately felt. Here are the 4 critical questions:
Do you see me?
Do you care that I’m here?
Am I enough for you or do you need me to be better in some way?
Can I tell that I’m special to you by the way that you look at me?
Whether it's your kids, your colleagues, your partner, the store clerk, or really anyone in your community, when someone feels genuinely appreciated by you, it’s because you treat them in such a way that affirmatively answers each question pretty consistently. It's because when you look at them, you actually take the time to see them.
We all make the mistake of blazing through “darling” moments every single day. (Ex: the child offering you a dandelion, the man who holds the door, the barista who put a heart in the foam of your coffee) Sometimes we don’t even remember much about our week because we just weren’t fully there.
The answer is quite simple: Slow down! Take a second to actually look at another person. Slowing down and taking the one extra second is how you connect. It's this incredibly simple part of the human experience that's getting lost in the modern rush. Taking the one extra second to connect is the secret to the people we find most charming. It's what the best leaders do -- helping people feel seen and valued will totally shift your life.
Connection is not based on how much time we spend with someone or what we do with them. Connection is always based on quality of presence. “ Let us celebrate that we come together as Rotarians each week, to truly “see” and value each other, and build connection. Thank you.
Do Good, Have Fun, Make Friends
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United States of America