Roseland Rotary Meeting September 14, 2017
Today was a little gloomy, some fog but not at the Roseland Rotary lunch meeting where everyone in attendance was sharp as a tack. Our friends at the Waterford Lodge were ready, as always, to take good care of their local Rotary Club. It’s hard to believe that it is the middle of September already. It won’t be too long before the Snowbirds start their annual migration. Today we had 15 members and our speaker in.jpg)
attendance.
attendance.A man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, "Can I park here?"
"No," says the cop.
"What about all these other cars?"
"They didn't ask!"
Speaking of Florida, all our members and their family members survived Hurricane Erma very well. Wally Johnson reports no damage at all to his place. Al Veldman reports his daughter had nothing other than some fence damaged. Tom Hickey reported that his three children, all living in the path of Erma, were safe and suffered no damage. Ben Bendit reported only a broken decorative window
shutter. A lot of lucky people and a lot of prayers answered.Bob Sones filled in for President Paula Sours as Paula is under the weather. This has nothing to do with a hurricane. Dave Keck gave the prayer and Bob led us in the pledge and four way test.
A man is found murdered on a Sunday morning. His wife calls the police, who question the wife and the staff, and are given the following alibis:
the wife says she was sleeping,
the butler was cleaning the closet,
the gardener was picking vegetables,
the maid was getting the mail, and
the cook was preparing breakfast.
Immediately, the police arrest the murderer.
Who did it and how did the police know?
Dollar Bill Dave Keck collected happy dollars and fines and did it with much gusto. Bill Brennen was 
happy to be moved into his new apartment. Frank Toepp was happy the sun just popped out. Don Kulwicki was fined for no pin as was George Stump. Morey Rosen was happy the Cubs won big time yesterday. Wally Johnson fined for no pin but happy his condo was not damaged. Ben Bendit was happy his place suffered no damage. Al Veldman was happy his grandson has just been signed to play for the Anaheim Ducks in the NHL. This is very cool! Rachel Bernhard is just happy to be here and we very happy to have her. Bob Sones is happy to be a part of this distinguished group. Really Bob, "distinguished!" As I think about it I guess we are distinguished, maybe even very distinguished. Tom Hickey was happy his 3 kids are safe. We are with you on that one Tom!
happy to be moved into his new apartment. Frank Toepp was happy the sun just popped out. Don Kulwicki was fined for no pin as was George Stump. Morey Rosen was happy the Cubs won big time yesterday. Wally Johnson fined for no pin but happy his condo was not damaged. Ben Bendit was happy his place suffered no damage. Al Veldman was happy his grandson has just been signed to play for the Anaheim Ducks in the NHL. This is very cool! Rachel Bernhard is just happy to be here and we very happy to have her. Bob Sones is happy to be a part of this distinguished group. Really Bob, "distinguished!" As I think about it I guess we are distinguished, maybe even very distinguished. Tom Hickey was happy his 3 kids are safe. We are with you on that one Tom!The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so Gomer - who was not exactly the sharpest nail in the bucket went in to try out for the job. "Okay," the sheriff drawled, "Gomer, what is 1 and 1?" "11" he replied. The sheriff thought to himself, "That's not what I meant, but he's right." "What two days of the week start with the letter 'T'?" "Today and tomorrow." He was again surprised that Gomer supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself. "Now Gomer, listen carefully: Who killed Abraham Lincoln?" Gomer looked a little surprised himself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, "I don't know." "Well, why don't you go home and work on that one for a while?" So, Gomer wandered over to the pool hall where his pals were waiting to hear the results of the interview. Gomer was exultant. "It went great! First day on the job and I'm already working on a murder case!"
David Keck introduced our speaker Tim Corbet of the Special Crimes Unit who is running for St. 
Joseph County Sheriff. Officer Corbet has been a police officer for 42 years and does not plan on retiring anytime soon. He is presently commander of the Metro Homicide unit for the St. Joseph County Prosecutor’s Office. He served in the South Bend Police Department as a homicide detective for many years before moving over to the Prosecutor’s Office.
Joseph County Sheriff. Officer Corbet has been a police officer for 42 years and does not plan on retiring anytime soon. He is presently commander of the Metro Homicide unit for the St. Joseph County Prosecutor’s Office. He served in the South Bend Police Department as a homicide detective for many years before moving over to the Prosecutor’s Office.Tim discussed his duties and answered a variety of questions from our members including questions concerning gang violence, murders etc. One question was on using his firearm. He noted that he has shot 4 people in the line of duty, two died and two were wounded. Tim wish’s no one would ever have to go through a shooting and would never have to shot anyone. Tim is a hardnosed cop and not much for political correctness. Most of us applaud him for that.
This is one you should not have missed.
This is one you should not have missed.A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered "Well, I have contacts."
The policeman replied "I don't care who you know! You're getting a ticket!"
A man murders his wife with a knife in their car. Nobody is around to see this.
He throws her out of the car being careful not to leave any fingerprints on her body.
Next he throws the knife off of a cliff into a gorge where it will never be found and he goes home.
An hour later the police call him and tell him that his wife has been murdered and he needs to come to the scene of the crime immediately.
As soon as he arrives, he is arrested.
How did they know he did it?
Erin Bonin won the drawing and will be buying property in Key West rather cheaply. Her winnings will go to build the Bonin Estate of Key West.
He throws her out of the car being careful not to leave any fingerprints on her body.
Next he throws the knife off of a cliff into a gorge where it will never be found and he goes home.
An hour later the police call him and tell him that his wife has been murdered and he needs to come to the scene of the crime immediately.
As soon as he arrives, he is arrested.
How did they know he did it?
Erin Bonin won the drawing and will be buying property in Key West rather cheaply. Her winnings will go to build the Bonin Estate of Key West.
Confucius say… prisoner who paints in jail, will have brush with the law.
Rotarians go into the day and be bright light.
PS, Your Little Old Editor apologizes for all the filler jokes and will refrain from doing in future publications, maybe!
