Laurie Shiell Exec. Dir. Centre Against Abuse
Posted by Keith Clifton
on Jan 16, 2011
Relationship abuse or domestic abuse is defined as a pattern of unwanted behaviours that are used to maintain power and control over an intimate partner. On the other hand, a disagreement is defined as the difference between conflicting facts or claims or opinions. disagreements are not used to maintain power or control over another person.
One of the most common forms of relationship abuse is physical abuse. This form of abuse is actually relationship violence. This includes hitting, biting, spitting, and restraining another person. Other forms of abuse include emotional, verbal, religious, sexual and financial, to name a few. Statistics show that 1 in 3 women and 1 in 6 men globally will experience some form of relationship abuse, directly or indirectly. Children exposed to relationship violence are at the strongest risk for transmitting violent behaviour from one generation to the next.
The Centre works toward our vision by providing shelter, support and tools for those involved in relationship abuse, and by creating abuse free advocates for an abuse free Bermuda through our education programmes. Our community services include: a safe house programme, a batterers intervention programme, 24 hour hot lines, anger management and mediation, counselling, and a community education and prevention programmes.
The centre against abuse has provided the only safe house on the island for women and children since 1979. This haven is the difference between life and death for many. It is important that we maintain a safe house in bermuda, as studies have shown that access to a safe house leads to a 60 – 70% reduction in incidence and severity of re-assault during the first 3 – 12 month follow-up period, compared to women who did not access a safe house. and studies have also shown that access to a safe house led to greater reduction in severe re-assault than did seeking court, or law enforcement protection, or moving to a family or friends home. We maintain 2 office locations to keep our male clients separate from our female clients. We provide anger management services to the community to assist people with determining the root of their anger, and provide them with a gamut of resources to maintain their calm in situations that previously triggered their aggression. We also provide mediation on relationship issues which ranges from divorce to child custody matters. mediations are normally requested by clients, the court, or government agencies. Our services also include group counselling for the women of our safe house programme and one on one counselling is offered to all our clients via our counsellor referral programme. we believe that we can best meet the counselling needs of our clients by referring them to a counsellor that most closely compliments their specific needs. our counsellor referral programme is very similar to the model of the employee assistance programme.
The centre against abuse started the first batterers intervention programme in Bermuda in 2000. We have run this programme for over 10 years with an 85% success rate. this is a 26 week group programme for men that runs throughout the year. This programme is specifically designed to hold perpetrators of relationship abuse accountable, challenging their beliefs, and teaching them new skills and providing them with tools that will facilitate changes in their behaviour.
If you are in an abusive relationship asking for help doesn't make you weak. We understand that telling somebody is difficult; you might feel ashamed, embarrassed or worry that you won't be taken seriously. But for everyone involved in an abusive relationship our advice is the same - you are not alone, and the centre against abuse is here to help.