a. "Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member Congress, but I repeat myself." Mark Twain
b. "Beauty is only skin deep, But ugly goes clear to the bone." A. B. Evans
c. "The tongue is the only instrument that gets sharper with use." Washington Irving
d. "The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder." Alfred Hitchcock
e. "The most truthful part of a newspaper is the advertisements." Thomas Jefferson