A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
Jokes about German sausages are the wurst.
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
When chemists die, apparently they barium.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
When you get a bladder infection you know urine trouble.
Broken pencils are pretty much pointless.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
Velcro - what a rip off!
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
I thought I saw an eye-doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical aleutian.
She was only a whiskey-maker, but he loved her still.
