Jen Vincent brought this back from her recent RLI visit to Pennsylvania.  Enjoy!

The Rotary Prescription
by Jeffry Cadorette, PDG, Rotary Club of Media, PA USA, District 7450
                       
Have you been feeling the urge to serve?
Do you have an increasing urge to give back to your local and or global community?
Do you feel isolated and have an urge to network and be connected to others? Do you have a fellowship deficiency?
Do you get frustrated with the situation in the world when you read the morning paper or watch the evening news?
Talk to your doctor about a once weekly dose of Rotary. Taken weekly…Rotary can reverse your fellowship deficiency. Within weeks of the initial dose it can help you to feel more networked and connected to your community. While it will not help with ALL of your urges……………..it will definitely help with your urge to serve others…(your doctor can suggest additional medications for your OTHER urges.)
Caution! Rotary can only be taken by adults. There are milder forms under the brand names of Rotaract, Interact, Early Act and Youth Exchange that can be taken by younger people often known as the New Generation
Rotary should not be taken by those who are taking Kiwanis, Optimists or Lions but you may want to talk with your physician about switching your prescription to Rotary as it has been shown to be faster acting and better tolerated in clinical studies. Rotary should not be taken while operating machinery or driving a car as it may cause drowsiness……. depending on the speaker.
It is recommended Rotary be taken with meals although those meals can cause, heartburn, acid reflux, constipation, diarrhea, peptic ulcers, gastric ulcers, bleeding ulcers, ulcerative gastritis, pancreatitis, sinusitis, laryngitis, encephalitis,  appendicitis, conjunctivitis, bronchitis, meningitis, tonsillitis, arthritis, neuritis,  heart attack, stroke, blurred vision, blindness, impaired hearing, premature alopecia, halitosis and diabetic neuropathy…….among others.
For optimal affect Rotary must be taken consistently. While weekly dosing is recommended, 2-3 times a month has been shown in clinical trials to be effective. If you leave home without your Rotary, you will find that people in other communities around the globe will typically be happy to share their Rotary with you so that you don’t miss your weekly dose.
From the time it was discovered over 107 years ago until 1988 it was thought that Rotary was unsafe if taken by women. Since that time women have been taking  Rotary in ever increasing numbers and studies have shown that it is very effective now in both men AND women. While no definitive research has been done, anecdotal evidence is that not only is Rotary not unsafe for women….they actually do better on it than men.
Side affects include the tendency to sit in the same seat at the same table every time you take your dose of Rotary. Talk with your physician about ways to overcome this. It may be a sign of deeper issues. Severe cases of this have been known to require aggressive psychiatric treatment.
Do not take Rotary if you feel that more people should be disadvantaged or suffer from hunger, poverty, illiteracy and disease as people taking Rotary tend to want to alleviate these conditions. Tell your physician if you have an aversion to world understanding and peace.
If your urge to serve lasts longer than 4 hours…consult your physician immediately. (This condition is common in past district governors.)
For a free trial of Rotary go to www.rotary.org and find out where it is being dispensed near you. Rotary….helping people for over 107 years with their urge to serve.
Talk to your doctor today.