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CINCO ISSUE
MAY 5, 2018
NEWS, NOTES & NONSENSE
AND THE WINNER WAS...
Thursday's program was presented by Nate Oberhauser. He is a home schooled 9th grader. Nate described the recent Teen Pact event that he participated in. The video is short and to the point. He's a really nice young man.
So...it seems that last week Bill handed off his Prez duties to Patty who, in turn, recruited Rhonda to handle the bell ringing. (Both had urgent business at Busch stadium.) It's no wonder that Bill couldn't figure out where the secured presidential satchel was located (it has all the codes).
We welcomed Wood River Rotarian Tommie.
Allen, Virgil and "Rain Man" Rod were the first to arrive. Post-nooners were Paul, Mark2, Brad1 and Matt.
Can Wainwright really morph into John Tudor? Virgil thinks not.
Paul was dressed for a wake.
21 members dined on baked chicken, mixed veggies, rice, garlic bread, salad and cookies. The garlic bread was good.
Mark3 is confident that his bionic knee is ready for a heavy rotation golf schedule.
'Bull tipping' may become a thing in Edwardsville.
Can anyone party better than the fine folks in Calhoun? Rhonda thinks not.
All our Mark's were present and account for.
Chris1 and Stacey are heading to Italy, sans the kiddos. Mark1 offered to serve as their guide.
Lori began circulating the sign-up sheet for the village clean-up day on June 2nd. It will ruin from 10-2, lunch is included. We will focus on the Route 3 corridor.
SAA sub Chris2 reported that Queenie was off on a boat trip to Chi-town. (I only report it). He drafted Nate, who was celebrating his 1 year Rotary anniversary, to help with the collection duties. We sang for Patty's birthday and fined everyone who were absent the previous week. Chris tossed out some tough trivia q's. Topics included galaxies, fingers, tennis and, for table 4, a chimps for chumps question. They got it wrong.
Lori still has 5 packs of BaseballMania tickets left. Got yours?
The 50-50 opportunities went to Allen and Bill. Guest Tommie took the scratch-off. Rhonda pointed out that Tommie's ticket seems to be drawn whenever she visits. That's the way we roll.
Opening duties were performed by Brad2, Chris1 and Dave, leading us in prayer on the National Day of Prayer.
That's all from here, have a fine and dry weekend.
AMOCO, WE HARDLY KNEW THEE
TRIVIA
(The answer can be found at the end of the newsletter)
More museums are offering "stroller tours" for babies and parents. According to one expert, what kind of art do babies like?
A-Works interrogating ephemeral signifiers of late capitalist hegemony
B-Czech photos of the 1920's
C-diaper collages
D-Stuff that's bold and colorful
May 5 is National Hoagie Day
61% of drivers in fatal traffic crashes were daydreaming, the number 1 distraction in those fatalities. 14% were distracted by cell phones.-Erie Insurance analysis of police data from 2012-2016
Riddle-You live in a one story house made "entirely of redwood". What color would the stairs be?
Answer: What stairs? You live in a one story house.
MAY 13, 2010
Current members in a leadership position:Chris1, Lori, Cory, Paul, Rhonda, Rod, Dave and Rick
Dave made a presentation about ham radio. That's a BIG 10-4, good buddy!
We were meeting at the rec center and dined on Chef Bob's chicken tender parm
TAA Rick announced that Wood River Rotarian (and retired Wood River Postmaster) Max Emery lost his battle with pancreatic cancer. Max and Dick Bell were the backbone of their club's Christmas orange sales fundraiser
Chris1 reported that Dick was off thinning the herd and plowing the lower 40 at his Calhoun estate
Mark1 announced that the next meeting program would be presented by WWII vet Jerry Legow
Unexpected lessons from my disaster relief experience
By Yannis Comino
Over my summer break at the University of Newcastle in New South Wales, I decided to trade in the warmer weather of Australia for an English winter. Why, you might ask, would I do such a thing? Well, the only way I can explain it is — I was presented with the opportunity of a lifetime. During my New Generations Service Exchange at the headquarters of ShelterBox International in Truro, Cornwall, I gained priceless insight and first-hand experience in disaster relief management.
Both my mother and father are members of the Rotary Club of Morisset, and their club’s constant promotion of ShelterBox gave me the idea to seek the exchange. I am currently working on a bachelor’s in Development Studies with the hope of pursuing a career in the aid sector through either community development or disaster management, so I was thrilled when my exchange was approved.
As I walked through the doors of ShelterBox headquarters, I was greeted by a youthful, vibrant, and enthusiastic team. I was impressed by their morning meetings, as they sit in front of four large television screens analyzing the current deployments and tracking global news of the day. To continue reading, link herehttps://bit.ly/2HLQ1sF
AND I QUOTE
"A step backward, after making a wrong turn, is a step in the right direction."-Kurt Vonnegut
"Some people become so expert at reading between the lines they don't read the lines."-Margaret Millar
"A neurosis is a secret you don't know you're keeping."-Kenneth Tynan
SHAMELESS PLUG
If you would like to share a link about an event that you support, here is you opportunity . Please forward a brief description of the event and the link by Thursday morning to be included in the next Banner. Our SAA reserves the right to request that may need to make a "donation" for your plug. Send to the editor- riki917@yahoo.com
SMILE
The phrase A ______ walks into a bar has provided the take-off point for an uncountable number of jokes over the years
-An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
-Two quotation marks walk into a “bar."
-A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
-Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.
-A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
-Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out - we don't serve your type."
- A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.
-Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.
-A synonym strolls into a tavern.
-At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar - fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.
-A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.
-The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
-A dyslexic walks into a bra.
- A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.
-A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
THE BOTTOM LINE
The median pay for Facebook's 25,000 employees last year was $240,430.-Businessinsider.com
Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta was the world's busiest passenger airport in 2017, with a total of 103.9 million passengers passing through. Next on the list are Beijing Capital, Dubai, Tokyo and Las Angeles-airportWorld.com
Companies short of workers are increasingly turning to teens to fill jobs. The 12-month average unemployment rate for teens in March was 13.9%, the lowest annual average since 2001 and about half of what it was in 2010. Last July, typically the month mnost teens work, the unemployment for 16-19-year-olds fell to 13.3%, the lowest rater since 1969-The Wall Street journal
