While I was working in the men's section of a department store, a woman asked me to help her choose a white dress shirt for her husband.
When I asked about his size, the woman looked stumped at first, then her face brightened. She held up her hands, forming a circle with her forefingers and thumbs.
"I don't know his size," she said, "but my hands fit perfectly around his neck."
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Christmas - The tree was set up in the office where I work, but the lady assigned to decorate it was off sick. I couldn't let the chance go by. I went to the storeroom, got an inktank for the printer, and hung it on one branch.
So on the first day of Christmas, we had a cartridge in a bare tree.
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A lawyer boarded an airplane with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde stewardess to take care of them for him. She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator.
He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in an arrogant manner that he was a lawyer, and threatened what would happen to her if she let them thaw out.
Shortly before landing, she used the intercom to announce to the entire cabin, "Would the lawyer who gave me the crabs, please raise your hand?"
Not one hand went up...so she took them home and ate them.
There are two really great lessons here:
1. Lawyers aren't as smart as they think they are; and,
2. Blondes aren't as dumb as most folks think!
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A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool.
After catching his breath he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?"
"No," he replied, "arthritis.
.jpg "President Ian Mc Kay & wife Sherril")
