Dad and Dave and old Bert have come forward to the modern day but they’re still the same characters they always were.
They head off to Sydney for a few days and, for the heck of it, and because Mum isn’t there to stop them, book themselves into a suite on the 90th floor of the biggest, poshest hotel in town. On their first night, returning to the hotel, they learn that the lifts are all inoperable and the only way to their room is to climb 90 flights of stairs. A bit of a problem this, because Dave’s sprained an ankle and the other two have to help him.
As they get to the door at the bottom of the stairs, Dad says, to help them along, he’ll tell political stories until they’re up to the 30th floor. From there to the 60th floor, old Bert can tell country stories and then, for the last 30 floors, Dave can tell ‘good news, bad news’ stories.
Struggling upstairs with the injured Dave goes pretty well because Dad as always spins a good yarn and keeps them amused. They’re getting a bit tired by the 60th floor but old Bert’s yarns have kept them going all right.
Now it’s Dave’s turn but he stops, turning to the others. He says, “Better tell you my first ‘good news, bad news’ yarn, I s’pose.” They tell him to spit it out.
“Well, the good news is I know where the key to our suite is”.
“Okay,” Dad and old Bert chorus, “what’s the bad news?”
“It’s in the glovebox of the car down in the basement”.
---------------------------
A guy advertised "Talking Dog For Sale, $50".
The first interested party rang and said "Gee a Talking Dog, why so cheap?”
The seller said, "The Lies, Oh the Lies".
---------------------------
A man was lying in hospital desperately sick and with an oxygen mask to help him breath. He asks the nurse, “Are my testicles black?”
Shocked and offended, the young nurse replied I’m sorry Mr Smith but you cannot ask that sort of question.
Again he asks – “Please tell me. Are my testicles black?”.
The nurse storms off and comes back with Matron a gruff woman at best “Now” Mr Smith, Matron declares, “what is your problem?”.
Removing the mask and summoning all his strength Mr Smith asks again….” Are my test results back?”
---------------------------
One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex standing in the foyer of the church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names and small American flags mounted on either side of it. The six-year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the little boy, and said quietly, 'Good morning Alex.'
'Good morning Pastor,' he replied, still focused on the plaque. 'Pastor, what is this? '
The pastor said, 'Well son, it's a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service.'
Soberly, they just stood together, staring at the large plaque. Finally, little Alex's voice, barely audible and trembling with fear asked.
'Which service, the 8:00 or the 10:30 ?'
.jpg "President Stephen Bellamy")
.jpg)
.jpg)
.jpg)
.JPG)
.jpg)
