The son of a Saudi mogul goes to study in Europe.
One night, the phone rings at the house of his parents.
Dad: How's your life going, son?
Son: It's going well, dad.
Dad: Is something wrong? You don't sound happy.
Son: No Dad, everything's fine. Berlin is wonderful, the people are nice and I really like it here.
Dad: Son, tell me the truth. I know something's not right.
Son: Dad, I am a bit ashamed to drive to my college with my gold Ferrari 599GTB when all my teachers and many fellow students travel by train.
Dad: My dear son, why didn't you say so earlier? I will send you 15 million euro this instant. Please stop embarrassing us and go and get yourself a train too.
-------------------------------------
A New York attorney representing a wealthy art collector called his client.
He says, "John, I have some good news and some bad news."
The art collector replied, "I've had an awful day; let's hear the good news first."
The attorney said, "Well, I met with your wife today, and she informed me that she invested $5,000 in two pictures that she thinks will bring a minimum of $15-20 million. I think she could be right."
John replied enthusiastically, "Well done! My wife is a brilliant businesswoman! You've just made my day. Now that I know that I can handle the bad news, you mind telling me what it is?"
The attorney replied, "The pictures are of you and your secretary."
-------------------------------------
A relative of mine has a lovely boss who is blind. The other day he was out shopping with his guide dog. On reaching the checkout, he heard some giggles around him and wondered what was happening.
“Excuse me, but do you also want to buy the bag of carrots you dog has in it’s mouth?” the cashier laughed.
The boss laughed too, then. Carrots are his dog’s favourite treat. He paid for them happily.
-------------------------------------
After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came for counseling.
When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade listing every problem they had ever had in all the years they had been married. On and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she endured.
Finally, after allowing this for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking the wife to stand, he embraced and kissed her long and passionately as her husband watched - with a raised eyebrow. The woman shut up and quietly sat down in a daze.
The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife needs at least 3 times a week. Can you do this?"
“Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesday …………..but I fish on Fridays.
.jpg)
