Executives & Directors
President Elect
Community Service
Vocational Service
Club Service
International Service
Rotary Foundation
Public Relations
Youth Service
May 22, 2019
May 29, 2019
Local Milk Industry
Jun 04, 2019
View entire list
Upcoming Events
Wine Tasting Night
Bohemia Cafe and Bar
May 31, 2019 6:30 PM
RC of Warrnambool change-over dinner.
Jun 18, 2019
RC of Port Fairy change-over dinner.
Jun 24, 2019
RC of Warrnambool Daybreak change-over dinner.
Jun 26, 2019
Warrnambool Central change-over dinner.
Jun 29, 2019
RC of East Warrnambool change-over dinner.
Jul 04, 2019
Grampians Camping Weekend
Parkgate caravan park
Oct 25, 2019 – Oct 27, 2019
View entire list
ClubRunner Mobile
Our Commanding Officer.
I attended a Group 5 meeting in Port Fairy last Wednesday night.
Of interest is an issue East Rotary is having finding enough volunteers to run their hole in one competition during December and January. I know several of our members helped out this summer, as did members of other clubs. East is looking for expressions of interest so see if the other clubs would be willing to contribute to the roster in exchange for a slice of the proceeds. On behalf of our club I expressed interest. We will see where the idea goes from here.
Janick has departed from Oz and we will farewell Lea at the end of the month at the wine tasting social evening.
I will be away this week, and PE Tickler has returned from his fishing adventures at the top end, so he will run the meeting.
Meeting Minutes 15 May 2019
An enjoyable meeting with an indeterminate number of attendees. Nooka was so dismayed at Robert Coffey’s handling of the Footy Tipping in his absence, that he was in a mood which could only be described as ”funny". Winnings have been paid out to 4 people who got nine. How could this happen? And instead of using names, Robert had apportioned a number to everyone so that he could keep track of things. A number? A number! And so when pressed for the attendance,…. "Who cares? It's just a number!"…
But we got past that and welcomed “The Life of” Riley as a guest again. Great to have you along Paul. Guest speakers were Rob Coffey and James Mepham reporting on the Peace Concert. Some great names among the bands…. "The Naked Waiters"…. Reminds me of my university days with "Frozen Doberman" and "the Fish John West Reject"… 360 tickets were sold for around $10,400. The budget was traditionally $6000 with $3000 for the bands and $3000 to be Lighthouse Theatre. Selling 200 tickets was the breakeven point. But the Lighthouse now costs $5300 being $2200 for the venue and $2100 per staff. So the total cost of putting on the event is now over $8000 meaning we made only $1800 on this occasion. There were however some abnormal costs including stick pins for award winners, and the drinks which were put on. Robert recommends raising the ticket from the $35 it has always been, to $40. Perhaps consider varying ticket costs depending on the position of seats?
Credit to James for his multimedia work which greatly contributed to ticket sales. Indeed James own presentation during lunch was a real eye-opener to those of us who don't live on Facebook. Prior to the event it had been thought this might be the last Peace Concert which is why we went with Peace awards. But the event went off so very well that it is proposed to repeat the concert next year and repeat awards, but with less in number. Rob points out that award winners provide an array of potential Rotary members.
The new arrangement for Fines continues to work seamlessly, with still no sign of Rowan O'Brien who was away for another month*. So Bomber Raymond was immediately fined again, and then with one fine from President Lewis we raised enough money to call it quits and go back to work/the rest of the day. His fine?.... On every person who didn't attend the Group 5 Social Day at Portland. Well done Lew.
*For members not up to speed, here is the story in brief.  Penno has been making a big contribution to the Central Spoke recently, and has introduced some ideas that are much better than what your editor has been doing for years.  One problem we had with the old roster was that the designated fines master often wasn’t at the meeting.  Penno came up with the idea that each week the fines master would choose who would be fines master for the next week.  The idea was that this would ensure we selected someone who would be there the following week. 
Penno’s plan kicked off on the first week with Bomber choosing Rowan to be fines master for the following week.  Rowan agreed, but neglected to mention that he was about to jet off to Europe and wouldn’t be back for several months.  Ahhh, yes Penno, don’t you just love it when a plan comes together!
Hola Penno!  Rowan and Lorraine
enjoy sangrias in Porto.
Rotary Horse proposal.
I am seeking expressions of interest from members and friends who may be interested in buying a share in a horse.  The plan would be to buy a share in a Wilde Racing horse, given their past support of our club.  I am proposing a social activity rather than a big investment in a horse, similar in nature to the way members bought shares in Physicality and Vassa Blue at recent auctions. 
All friends of the club are invited; members, partners etc.  If we have enough interested people, then we can discuss what horse and how much of a share we want to buy and make a collective decision. 
If you might be interested in joining us, please let me know in the next few weeks.  Reply to this email, send me a text on 0418582024, or let me know at a meeting.
If we have sufficient interest, I will let you know and we can proceed from there.
Camping trip.
Don't forget to book if you have not already.
Contact details to make a booking;
Park Gate Caravan Park Halls Gap.
Bookings – 1800 810 781

Redacted joke.

If Lew is the Robert Mueller of our club, then I suppose your correspondent is the Bill Barr.
And now, a word from our sponsor.
Pip continues to sell advertising.

Insults from the President.

Lew writes;

These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words:

The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor:
She said, “If you were my husband I’d give you poison.”
He said, “If you were my wife, I’d drink it.”

A Member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.”
“That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”

“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” - Winston Churchill

I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.” Clarence Darrow

“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.” - Moses Hadas

“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” - Mark Twain

“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.” - Oscar Wilde
“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend … if you have one.” - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
“Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second … if there is one.” - Winston Churchill, in response.

“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.” - Stephen Bishop

“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” - John Bright

“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.” - Irvin S. Cobb

“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.” - Samuel Johnson

“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” - Paul Keating

“In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.” - Charles, Count Talleyrand

Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?” - Mark Twain

“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” - Mae West

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” - Oscar Wilde

“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts … for support rather than illumination.” - Andrew Lang (1844 – 1912)

“He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.” - Billy Wilder

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.” - Groucho Marx

Thank you to all those who contributed this week.
Please send contributions to;