- I don't trust these stairs because they're always up to something.
- The one who invented the door knocker got a No-bell prize.
- A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said 'No change yet'.
- A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tyred.
- When the cannibal showed up late to the luncheon, they gave him the cold shoulder.
- The other day I held the door open for a clown. I thought it was a nice jester.
- It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.
- Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.