This week our Jesters Ginia Reddaway and Charlotte England tell us a Scottish story, as they keep an eye open on the world.

They are amazed at the changes they see.

First the BIRD Flu, then the SWINE Flu, Mad Cow Disease, the Asian Hornet , the Ebola Virus, the Coronavirus. 

And now the Asian moth.

         

 

      

 

 

 

 

Charlotte England has also noticed some societal changes . . . 

 

          

 

 

      

 

 

      

 

 

A Canny Scotsman!

A Scotsman (wearing his kilt and a bonnet) walks into offices of private bankers Coutts & Co in the Strand, London (Bankers to the Royal Family since 1820) and asks to speak to the Manager. He informs him that he is going abroad on business for two weeks and needs to borrow £5,000.

The Manager tells him that Coutts & Co would only be delighted to meet his requirements but that he will understand that since he is not a client of the Bank, it would need some modest security for the loan.

So the Scotsman opens his sporran, takes out the keys and documents of a brand new Ferrari parked in front of the bank and hands them to the Manager saying “Will this do?” He also produces the car’s log book, and after a phone call everything checks out fine. The Manager agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan; the cashier hands out £5,000 while the bank’s porter drives the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage for safekeeping.

Over lunch Manager tells his colleagues the amusing little story of how a simple-minded Scot from North of the Border secured a loan for £5,000 offering a £120,000 Ferrari as collateral and they all enjoy a good chuckle as they sip their Port.

Two weeks later, the Scotsman returns, repays the £5,000 and the interest, which comes to £15.41. The manager says, "Sir, we have been more than happy to have had your business and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are just a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are in fact a wealthy property investor. What puzzles us is why would you bother to borrow £5,000 from us?"

The Scotsman replies: "Where else in London can I park my Ferrari for two weeks for only £15.41 and expect it to be still there when I return?"

Oooch man! – ya canna beat a canny Scot!

 

 

Finally, a plaintive note from a member who chooses to remain nameless:

I was listening to the radio this morning when the host invited callers to reveal the nick-names they had for their wives.

The best call was from a brave chap who called his wife "Harvey Norman"

The Host asked him why that name?

He replied, "Absolutely no interest for 36 months."