Andrea Driessen’s TedX talk went viral one day after she described how Gracenotes engage the recipient and writer in meaningful ways; and how a simple note can help organizations and individuals be more effective, resilient, and empathetic. Although a Gracenote is a euphemism for ‘thank you note’, these simple communications can have long-lasting benefits.
“Why do we wait so long to talk about someone until they have died?” she began. “How do we honor those who are very much alive?”. She described how her dad reacted when she wrote his “living eulogy” as a repeatable tool for love and gratitude.
“We underestimate the impact of a Gracenote on the giver as well as the receiver,” she said. “Send a Gracenote to yourself via snail mail to gauge how your perspective changes…just the sense of holding the note as a receiver.” A Gracenote can be a written note, video, photo collage, PowerPoint deck…the medium, she continued, doesn’t’ matter as much as the doing.
She described the four reasons people don’t write Gracenotes or thank you notes. “People feel awkward, they lack time, don’t have the emotional bandwidth, or just don’t know what to say,” she said.
“A Gracenote is not a ‘grace-dissertation’, you can free write your ideas on the page about a person, not as an expert but just sounding like yourself – and there’s no way to sound bad.”
“A Gracenote is not a ‘grace-dissertation’, you can free write your ideas on the page about a person, not as an expert but just sounding like yourself – and there’s no way to sound bad.”
Following hundreds of studies, she says a Gracenote increases the level of happiness for the receiver.
It is important to make 20-30 minutes of “Quietude” to compose a Gracenote. “It is not the task but the impact of a Gracenote on the recipient,” she said. “When I think about a person I want to ‘grace’, I think about what is most important about them, or how they show up to the world – all the different ways the person has made a difference.”
In conclusion, she asked Rotarians in attendance and those on Zoom to pair up and practice writing a Gracenote about someone else. The exercise was helpful for all to understand the value of these simple notes of thanks, gratitude, or inspiration.
President Jimmy rang the bell promptly at 12:30, introducing Linda Rough with Jevon Powell for the day’s anthem and followed by Tom Mesaros with the day’s inspiration.
He then turned the podium to past president Dorothy Bullitt who provided a thoughtful reflection about the day when the late South African Anglican bishop and theologian, Desmond Tutu, spoke at Seattle Rotary in the spring of 2002.
“Due to recent illness, his handlers wanted him to speak for only 20 minutes as he energetically started speaking,” she began and describe highlights of his talk. “Hope is being able to see there is light despite all of the darkness,” Tutu said. “Without forgiveness, there is no future.” More than 1,000 Rotarians and guests attended the meeting to hear Bishop Tutu’s vision, she said, of sharing the power of forgiveness, easy smiles, infectious love, and beaming light.
The monthly Member Spotlight was delivered by John Steckler who introduced long-time Rotarian Michael O’Byrne as a rabid Husky, accomplished sailor, and active in the Navy League and USO Puget Sound. He said Michael came to Seattle with his family at a young age. He built his first boat in high school, using it to save the hydro driver of the ‘Slo-Mo’ from Lake Washington after the hydro had flipped. Michael attended the UW, joining the Navy ROTC unit there where he honed his interest in nuclear submarines. Having served on several submarines, he led a team to reduce the noise of nuclear subs; and brings us the term ‘silent but deadly.'
He left the Navy to pursue a long successful career in business from General Manager of Paccar Parts to VP of Kenworth trucks and as President of a software company. Michael gave up sailboat racing, on his boat Boomerang, after winning several races, and remains active with the Navy League coaching UW ROTC mid-shipmen/women on how to sail. He met his wife of 57 years, Penny, at the UW, and they now enjoy time with their three grown children and six grandchildren.
President Jimmy concluded the meeting with a reference to our program speaker and Gracenotes.
“Gracenotes helps improve relationships,” he said, “and how these notes fit the third element of the Rotary four-way test: build goodwill and better friendships.” Rotarians inspire hope.
“Gracenotes helps improve relationships,” he said, “and how these notes fit the third element of the Rotary four-way test: build goodwill and better friendships.” Rotarians inspire hope.
